Okay... so it's been almost 7 months since I've blogged last. Wow. I think I am probably the worst blogger ever. Let's be honest - I AM the worst blogger ever. There I said it. We all feel better now.
I recently had someone ask if I kept a blog because they'd like to "keep up with me," and I said - yes, well...no, well...I did, kind of. It was a mess of an answer. So, I decided to re-visit my blog. As I skimmed over some of my old posts - I chuckled at some of them and thought to myself - this stuff really came out of my brain? I must be an alien.
A lot has happened in the last 7 months, I must say. But honestly, I've found most people don't really care what has happened, but more what you've learned through what has happened. One thing that I have known for a long time but that has recently been solidified even more is that I know I must be positively affecting people's lives to be truly happy. I know I must write - whether it's songs, quotes, blogs, on a napkin at dinner... I know I must talk to God. I know I need to let go of what other people say and think. I know I need to not be so hard on myself. I also know that sometimes not having a plan is the best way to live. I also know that I love Cadbury eggs. Ok, well...we already knew that last one.
I'm in a weird, but very good spot in my life, which makes for good writing. I can say that I have made/am making a full time living doing music, which is rare these days, and I am teaching fitness classes 5 days a week which feeds my need to touch lives and help people realize their potential. It's never enough though. I feel like I was put here to do something more... My thoughts, imagination and dreams run wild like a river with many channels reaching off in different directions. Each of these channels are desperately reaching for some kind of ocean to pour into and feed...
Chew on that for a minute. :)
I'm a searcher, a dreamer and a non-settler. Sometimes I yearn for that 9-5 just to feel what it would be like to go to work everyday and then come home and leave it all behind. Sometimes I wonder if I had a white picket fence life with a husband, 3 kids, 2 dogs and a cat complete with the kid-proofed SUV with the stick figures on the back letting everyone know who and what are my family...if I'd be happier... Maybe one day. But I guess for now, I need to be busy, stressed out, thinking and seeking more...always.
So, in the midst of this time, I need to blog. I need to write and share and say way too much, and maybe someone out there will find it inspiring or interesting at the least. Or maybe they'll relate to me, want to be better, or see themselves in something I write... even if it's just the fact that they might love Cadbury eggs too. :)
